A Step in the Right Direction
by Please Don't Hold Back
Summary: slight: Ritsuka x Soubi Ritsuka gets closer to the meaning of love Rewritten


DISCLAIMER: I own known of these characters, nor am I earning any money off them

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"Mother!" Ritsuka muttered.

His mother was having another fit, smacking him and throwing things at him.

"You aren't Ritsuka! What have you done with him you monster! Give me back my child!"

"I'm sorry," Ritsuka whispered so quietly he couldn't even hear.

His blood was everwhere, he wasn't even sure what was bleeding and what wasn't; wasn't sure what body part hurt the most. He just knew that this was the worst beating yet.

"Leave! Get out you imposter! I don't want to see you ever again! Get out of my house! Don't come back until you're my little boy again!" his mother demanded, smacking him hard in the face and making poor Ritsuka bite his tongue, which promptly started bleeding.

Obedient and thankful of an excuse to leave, Ritsuka ran towards the door under the barrage of raining objects. Unfortunately it was a painful journey. A tin can hit him in the back of the head so hard his flesh broke open. Then a chair crashed into his back, making him topple over. After that a plate crashed into the side of his face, breaking and scrapping up his cheek.

But no matter what, he kept up his run at the door, he had to obey his mother, it was the least he could do. He skipped the steps and with them the faster escape route to his room and threw himself out the door, being careful not to slam it when he got out side. If he did that she'd be even madder for an even longer period of time.

LOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESS

Ritsuka didn't mind, in all honesty. Getting hit, getting screamed at, getting kicked out of the house: it was all his punishment for wearing the face of the real Ritsuka. But although he didn't mind having all those things happen to him, he did need a place to sleep until his mother calmed down.

_Ugh, I guess I didn't really think this through. I have no idea where I'm supposed to go._

He started listing off possibilities in his head.

_Park bench? No, it looks as if it could rain._

_An abandoned car? No, who knows if it's really abandoned, and if it was, it could get crushed in the junkyard at any time. It wouldn't be very safe._

_Under the bridge? No, that's normally where the homeless in town live. Who knows how crazy they are._

_Stay in a store that's open twenty-four hours? No, I couldn't get to sleep. Who knows when I'll be able to come back home._

_A homeless shelter? No, they'd probably do something if a child under eighteen walked in. They'd call children's services or something like that._

_Yukio's? No, her parents would definitely try to get involved and if that happened who knew what would happen to Mother. _

_Soubi's? _"No way," said Ritsuka out loud, "Who knows what perverted things he would do to me."

Alright, he'd sleep under the bridge. He needed the water located nearby so he could wash off anyway. Plus, he looked rather worn out and shabby, maybe the homeless people wouldn't mind if another homeless person shared their bridge.

LOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVLESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLO

"What are you doing? Get out of here! This is ours!" a homeless man cried when he came upon Ritsuka sitting under the bridge.

At first when Ritsuka got there no one was around and he had begun to think it was a rumor that homeless people slept here. Unfortunately, the darker it got, the more people came over to yell at him for sleeping under _their_ bridge.

Ritsuka was getting more and more miserable. Not only was it too cold to wash off in the river (so he still had blood on him) he was getting more and more scared each time someone else yelled at him. He hated yelling and these people were getting angry.

"Ritsuka?" asked a familiar voice.

"Soubi?" Ritsuka guessed, looking up at the person talking.

"What are you doing here?" Soubi asked, "Don't you have a home to go back too?"

"Well…" Ritsuka tried to explain, "I will, just not right now…I mean…I got my mother upset at me again."

"What kind of mother do you have that would kick her son out of the house?" Soubi asked angrily.

"No, it was really my fault," Ritsula answered, defending his mother, "It was my mistake she got so angry, because I'm not who I look like on the outside. I'm not really her son, so…"

"I live a few blocks from here," Soubi answered, interrupting Ritsuka.

"What?" asked Ritsuka, confusing showing in his face.

"I only live a few blocks from here," Soubi replied.

"So?" Ritsuka asked, not getting the point of the conversation.

"I live very close," Soubi restated, "So close I could probably carry you there within twenty minutes."

"What?" Ritsuka asked again, "Can't you just say what you mean?"

"I think I'm being very clear," Soubi defended.

"He wants ta take ya home, ya stupid kid. So go wit' him an' leave us alone. Go on now," a homeless man explained.

"He's prob'ly lookin' to get ya inta bed wit him," another said, "Rip ya ears right offa ya."

"Don't say that!" yet another one said, "Then he'll never be leaving us."

"Wou-would you actually do that Soubi?" Ritsuka asked nervously.

"Of course not!" Soubi answered, "I just want to give you someplace to sleep."

"Oh," said Ritsuka, believing the earless man, "I suppose…I mean, it would be better than this bridge."

Soubi smiled, "Wonderful. Come on then," he added, picking Ritsuka up and carrying him bridal position.

"He's def'nitely gonna rape that kid, no doubt in my mind," a homeless man said, watching them go.

"Well who really gives a shit about it anymore, huh?" someone else answered him, "He's outta our hair now, right? So how's about mindin' your own business an' leavin' the kid alone to fight his own battles, eh?"

"I'm jus' happy ta be having me bridge back, tha' little boy didn't belong here in the firs' place."

LOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSL

"You're bleeding," Soubi stated, still carrying his master, "What happened?"

"It was my fault," Ritsuka said, not explaining anything, "Please don't worry about it."

"Of course I have to worry about it, I love you," Soubi answered.

"Please don't say things like that right now," Ritsuka begged, "I can't handle it. So please…"

"Ritsuka…" Soubi began, anxious about his new master's condition.

"Please…" Ritsuka tried to start off, but he feinted and fell silent in Soubi's arms.

"That house isn't safe," Soubi announced to a sleeping Ritsuka, carrying him toward his apartment, "I hope you decide to keep living with me when your mother decides she wants you back, otherwise I'll worry about you too much."

LOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESS

"Hm?" Ritsuka, waking up in a strange bedroom.

"Soubi?" he asked the empty room, remembering what happened. "Soubi, please come here."

"Yes?" Soubi coming in with a washcloth and bandages.

"What happened?" Ritsuka asked, "And what are you doing?"

"We met under the bridge and you feinted as I brought you here. Your wounds are pretty bad so I decided that I definitely needed to clean them before I bandaged them," Soubi answered calmly, "May I clean and bandage your wounds?"

"Mm-hmm," answered Ritsuka tiredly.

"After I do this you can go back to sleep. We'll worry about things when you're feeling better," Soubi assured him.

"Talk about what? Why can't we talk now? I like talking to you Soubi," Ritsuka said, beginning to become delirious.

"I love talking to you Ritsuka," Soubi answered, "But for now you should sleep, we'll talk when you're feeling better."

LOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESSLOVELESS

Ritsuka yawned when he woke up and opened his eyes to Soubi's hair pushed into his face.

"What?" asked Ritsuka to no one in particular.

"Oh, good morning Ritsuka," replied Soubi calmly, looking up at his master.

Ritsuka was on top of Soubi, using his shoulder as a pillow.

"What were you doing sleeping in the same bed as me?" Ritsuka asked angrily, just realizing it.

"I didn't think you'd mind and I decided it was either the bed or the floor, and the floor is- regrettably- quite hard," Soubi answered.

"Well, I do mind," retorted Ritsuka, "I don't like it when you do things like that."

"But Ritsuka, I love you," Soubi replied to the boy.

"Stop saying that!" Ritsuka shouted.

"Is that an order?" Soubi asked quietly.

"No…" Ritsuka responded. It was true that he got confused with Soubi telling him that he loved him, but he didn't really want it to end.

"Order me," Soubi begged.

"I…I order you to…to let me stay here for awhile," Ritsuka said in a voice that was more questioning than demanding.

"Yes Master," Soubi replied with a happy smile on his face.

"And let me go back to sleep," Ritsuka added, a little more commandingly.

"Yes Sir," Soubi again replied, his smiling fading as he got up to let Ritsuka sleep.

"What are you doing?" Ritsuka blurted out, fear in his eyes, " I meant for you to stay here while I slept."

"Yes Master," Soubi said, his eyes dancing once again.

"Don't think this means anything," Ritsuka replied to the smiling Soubi, "It's just warner when you're next to me is all."

"Of course," answered Soubi, "I understand. You just want my body heat."

"Yes," said Ritsuka confidently.

"But while you just want my body heat," Soubi continued, "I want your body."

"W-w-why do you say things like that all the time?" Ritsuka asked, deeply blushing.

"Because I love you," Soubi answered without hesitation.

"My real name is 'Loveless' right?" Ritsuka asked, " 'One without love'. By definition you can't love me."

"My real name is 'Beloved'," Soubi started to answer, " One who is loved by everyone'. By definition you should love me, and yet you don't."

"Mm…I don't know what love is," Ritsuka explained, "It's confusing when you say those things to me. I don't know what to do."

"You should let me," Soubi replied, staring up at the ceiling.

"Huh?" asked Ritsuka, confused.

"Let me love you. I don't want you to be loveless," Soubi answered him.

"I don't now how. You're so confusing Soubi," Ritsuka complained.

"Stay here with me," said Soubi, changing the subject slightly, "I don't want you to go back to that house, it's dangerous."

"It's my fault though, I provoke her. I'm not the child I'm supposed to be, I-it's his life…I've stolen it," Ritsuka replied, closing his eyes.

"I love you the way you are. Even if your mother doesn't, I do. Isn't that enough for you to want to stay the same?" Soubi asked.

"Love, hm? What a strange word. I wish I could understand it, maybe then this would be easier," Ritsuka spoke, as if talking to himself.

"I can show you. Let you experience it," Soubi offered, "Here, lift up your head."

Ritsuka complied and Soubi rewarded him with a kiss.

"Do you feel it? That tingling feeling?" Soubi asked.

"That is love? It doesn't make sense. I'm supposed to love my mother, though I never get that feeling from her. It's peculiar," Ritsuka responded in the same tone as before.

"That is the feeling between lovers. The love between lovers," Soubi explained.

"You say such weird things," Ritsuka complained, turning red, "Let me sleep, okay?"

"Hm-mm," Soubi answered, kissing the top of his master's head, "Think about it…while you sleep, think about it," Soubi added, to an already sleeping Ritsuka.


End file.
